March 7, 2006 - Tuesday
Current mood: relieved
I have been struggling a lot lately with "God's will"...That is a term we throw around a lot as Christians, but I don't necessarily buy into the idea that God has one specific, fool-proof plan for your life and you have to figure out exactly what that is or you can't be "in His perfect will." That's too hard, and we're not robots. What about the freedom found in Christ? So, I was straightening shelves at the bookstore the other day...a feat which I hate to tackle, and often avoid until the last possible minute.
Understanding God's will: How to Hack the Equation Without Forumlas, was written by Kyle Lake. You may have heard about Kyle's tragic death. He was in a freak accident at a church service last fall, in which he was electrocuted and died. He left behind a wife and three small children, and a very large church in Texas, full of baffled believers.
That's not really too relevant to the book, though, although it does give kind of a different perspective on some of the things he says in there.
I'm not quite finished with the book yet, but I have learned two very important things...I'll try to explain them the best I can, using the examples I remember from Kyle.
Lesson 1: It's more about the journey than the destination.The first truth Kyle brought out in this book was that Christians get so caught up in "finding God's will for their lives". Well, do you think God's will is for you to have that one specific career? And then what? Then you've already accomplished His will, so you're sitting pretty for the rest of your life? We get way too focused on certain destinations or points in our lives. I've said all of this before. I am always looking forward to the next big step, as to when my life will really start. "Oh, when I move to Nashville, that's when my life will finally make sense." Or, "Once I get married and start a family, then I can really start living." Well, reaching a certain destination is never going to bring fulfillment or any sense of contentment. Know why? We weren't created for any specific destination on this earth. We we will not be perfectly fulfilled until we have reached our ultimate destination, which is being in the eternal presence of God. Life here on earth is more about the journey. We are not supposed to keep our eyes totally focused on whatever destination we are reaching for. If you are constantly looking into tomorrow, you miss everything that is happening in your life today. Just as we shouldn't dwell on the past, we also should not get ourselves so wrapped up in the future, that we neglect the present.
Lesson #2 God is our Father.In the second section of the book, Kyle uses a metaphor of God as our Father. A lot of people have a hard time with this metaphor, because of their family situations. Kyle explains that God our Father is not an absent, workaholic who neglects the children he has brought into this world, nor is he an overprotective father, who will not allow his children to grow up.
He uses an example of his daughter. At the time he was writing, his daughter was two. He explained that he and his wife never allowed little Avery to give her input for any decisions regarding her life. If they left the decisions up to her, she would just whine all the time for junk food and stay up late and run around naked. She was totally reliant upon them for her protection and her providence, to ensure that she would live a full and healthy life. He then said that when Avery was 16, this same parenting tactic would not work. He could not make all of Avery's decisions for her. She would have learned to rationalize and use logic and arguments and reasoning in order to make decisions for herself. He, as her father, would still offer his input, but he would trust that he had raised her in such a way that she would be able to make some decisions by herself by that point in her life. He also used the example of a child in college. The child calls his father and asks, "Father, what is your will for my college major?" The father replies, "Son, my will is for you to make your own decision, based on what you are interested in."
Doesn't it make sense that if God has created us for a journey, he would allow us to experience it, allowing us to make some stupid mistakes, but always being by our side to comfort us when we do? I think there's a lot more freedom in Christ than we realize. I'm not tied down to one specific career path, one specific location, maybe even one certain man I HAVE to marry. Life isn't about finding the next puzzle piece. It's about being on your journey, pleasing God, and learning new things every step along the way.
So that's what I've learned so far...You have to forgive me because my explanations weren't nearly as good as Kyle's...Hey! Maybe you should just go read the book for yourself.
Currently reading : Understanding God's Will: How To Hack The Equation Without Formulas By Kyle Lake Release date: 31 October, 2004
Tuesday, March 7, 2006
Tuesday, February 21, 2006
Archives: Adventures in Babysitting
February 21, 2006 - Tuesday
Current mood: crazy
This is a true story. The biography of a 23 year old girl, temporarily thrown into motherhood well before her time. The people are real, but the names have been changed to protect the identities of everyone involved.
It all started on a blustery Wednesday night in mid-February. There was an eery chill in the air and Nicola knew she was in for a stressful week. Her parents had decided to jaunt a few states over to Florida to watch the Daytona 500...A slight inconvenience, of course. But Nicola contemplated how her parents had provided and cared for her throughout her entire life, and she decided to comply with their request (that, and they really left her no choice). Wednesday night was rather uneventful. Her brother Mitchelo, finished his homework, took care of the animals, and retired for the evening. Nicola took care of some household chores, and prepared herself for her lovely day off tomorrow.
Thursday was wonderful. No problems. No major messes. Nicola began to think that perhaps this week wouldn't be so terrible afterall.
Friday morning, Mitchelo got ready for school, and Nicola groggily took him to his friend's house where he was to catch the bus for school. Nicola made sure she had plenty of time to get him there, but Mitchelo noticed the bus passing by on the way to his friend's house, and told Nicola that apparently the bus had come early that morning, and that she would have to drive him to school. They arrived back home, and Nicola resigned herself to the fact that she would not be resting anymore that morning, and about 10 minutes later, Mitchelo's friend Keitho called to ask Mitchelo why he wasn't there to catch the bus. Nicola wearily took Mitchelo and Keitho to school that morning, and as she was driving, Keitho explained that the bus driver drives past the house two times to go around the circle before actually stopping at his house. Nicola's brain was saying, "I told you so", but her mouth simply smiled.
When Saturday arrived, Nicola knew the remainder of the weekend, and into the next week, would be very taxing on her. For now she would be caring not only for young Mitchelo, but also for a bright young girl named Kristena and her teenage brother named Davido. She worked hard all day long, and then stood in the freezing cold temperatures to fill up her car with gas for the long and grueling journey that lay ahead of her in the following days.
The next two days were filled with entertaining children, preparing food, cleaning up after children, enforcing regulatory bath and shower times, and supervising calls to mommy and daddy.
From Saturday until Tuesday, Nicola drove over 150 miles, just around her small village. She had to continually travel back and forth between the house of Kristena and Davido and the house of Nicola and young Mitchelo. Mitchelo was requried to take care of all of his animals twice a day, which made for some very tiresome journeys through the vast countryside. Nicola would arise around 6:00 in the morning, and not lay her head to the pillow until approximately 12:30AM because she was busy cleaning, preparing for the next day, doing laundry, and writing in her online journals.
There were some tears, some tummy aches, and some wimpering calls to mommy, but through it all Nicola learned the joys and challenges of motherhood. She decided that she would never have children and probably never even get married...Either that, or she would simply not attempt to manage two households at once for a long time...
And they all lived happily ever after. The End.
Currently ListeningThe Mission BellBy Delirious?see related
Current mood: crazy
This is a true story. The biography of a 23 year old girl, temporarily thrown into motherhood well before her time. The people are real, but the names have been changed to protect the identities of everyone involved.
It all started on a blustery Wednesday night in mid-February. There was an eery chill in the air and Nicola knew she was in for a stressful week. Her parents had decided to jaunt a few states over to Florida to watch the Daytona 500...A slight inconvenience, of course. But Nicola contemplated how her parents had provided and cared for her throughout her entire life, and she decided to comply with their request (that, and they really left her no choice). Wednesday night was rather uneventful. Her brother Mitchelo, finished his homework, took care of the animals, and retired for the evening. Nicola took care of some household chores, and prepared herself for her lovely day off tomorrow.
Thursday was wonderful. No problems. No major messes. Nicola began to think that perhaps this week wouldn't be so terrible afterall.
Friday morning, Mitchelo got ready for school, and Nicola groggily took him to his friend's house where he was to catch the bus for school. Nicola made sure she had plenty of time to get him there, but Mitchelo noticed the bus passing by on the way to his friend's house, and told Nicola that apparently the bus had come early that morning, and that she would have to drive him to school. They arrived back home, and Nicola resigned herself to the fact that she would not be resting anymore that morning, and about 10 minutes later, Mitchelo's friend Keitho called to ask Mitchelo why he wasn't there to catch the bus. Nicola wearily took Mitchelo and Keitho to school that morning, and as she was driving, Keitho explained that the bus driver drives past the house two times to go around the circle before actually stopping at his house. Nicola's brain was saying, "I told you so", but her mouth simply smiled.
When Saturday arrived, Nicola knew the remainder of the weekend, and into the next week, would be very taxing on her. For now she would be caring not only for young Mitchelo, but also for a bright young girl named Kristena and her teenage brother named Davido. She worked hard all day long, and then stood in the freezing cold temperatures to fill up her car with gas for the long and grueling journey that lay ahead of her in the following days.
The next two days were filled with entertaining children, preparing food, cleaning up after children, enforcing regulatory bath and shower times, and supervising calls to mommy and daddy.
From Saturday until Tuesday, Nicola drove over 150 miles, just around her small village. She had to continually travel back and forth between the house of Kristena and Davido and the house of Nicola and young Mitchelo. Mitchelo was requried to take care of all of his animals twice a day, which made for some very tiresome journeys through the vast countryside. Nicola would arise around 6:00 in the morning, and not lay her head to the pillow until approximately 12:30AM because she was busy cleaning, preparing for the next day, doing laundry, and writing in her online journals.
There were some tears, some tummy aches, and some wimpering calls to mommy, but through it all Nicola learned the joys and challenges of motherhood. She decided that she would never have children and probably never even get married...Either that, or she would simply not attempt to manage two households at once for a long time...
And they all lived happily ever after. The End.
Currently ListeningThe Mission BellBy Delirious?see related
Wednesday, February 1, 2006
Archives: Do You Believe Those Who are Single are the Devil's Children?
February 1, 2006 - Wednesday
Current mood: aggravated
OK, on another website I frequent, I have been involved in a discussion about this article. Here's the link: http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001199.cfm
read it, then come back and let me know what you think!
My grandmother has a really bad habit. Well, she probably wouldn't consider it a bad habit, but me (along with all of her other grandchildren) are severely annoyed. We all know she is going to do it. If you're over the age of 16, and you're in her presence, you can count on it. She greets you, gives you a hug, tells you one of two things (you look nice, or "don't you ever wear makeup?"), spends some time in casual conversation, compliments you a little. And just when you think you've escaped it, these words flow forth from her mouth like molten lava from a volcano, "So, Nicole (or whichever grandchild she happens to be talking to), you got a boyfriend...yet?"
Now, my cousins and I have been able to come up with some pretty creative responses to this question. One said, "No, Mama, I've decided I'm not going to get married." I told her once, "No. No boys like me. No boys will ever like me. I've just resigned myself to that fact." But the one classic response that left her speechless came from my sister (it was indeed a proud moment in the family), "No, Grandma, I'm a lesbian"...I'm trying to come up with a response to top that for next time. Bless my Grandma's heart. She is a very young grandmother. Young in years, and young at heart. She is a beautiful woman, a fashionable dresser, and a loving and godly person, but she just doesn't get it. Things were different in her day. She was married at the ripe old age of 15. She had more than one child at the age of 20. That life was all she knew. So she thinks me and my cousins are all old maids, and we better find us a man before it's slim pickin's.
She doesn't realize that the world is different now. Just like the author of this article doesn't realize that times have changed since the Bible. I don't go out and sit by the well to wait for a man to ask me to water his camels. I don't wear a veil to church. I don't go out and work in the family fields all day. I don't keep silent so as not to disturb the men.
Over time, God has allowed women a little more freedom. Some may call this a curse, I count it a blessing. Call it whatever you want, we are not the same. And with this added freedom comes added responsibility. We are now able to participate in worship services. We can go out and have a good time with our friends. We can have jobs and receive good education. We can be scholars of the Bible and drive cars and live our lives and date (that's right, I said 'the d word').
In the world we live in right now, we would never dream of sending a 14 year old girl into marriage. That's what they did in the Bible, though. But what Ms. Maken doesn't realize is that girls were sent into marriage at such a young age because they lifted a huge financial burden from their families. One less mouth to feed, one less kid to watch. And a 14 year old girl would have already learned all the ins and outs about keeping house, caring for children, tending the animals, providing for a husband. Times have changed. It is perfectly fine for a woman to wait until she is in her 20's to get married.
And it's not because of superficial men. I know many young men who are living godly lives and trusting God for their futures. I know a lot of men who would say their dream is to be a good father and husband, and they're just waiting on God's providence. And it's not because of "sewing our wild oats". I have no proverbial oats to be sewn. I don't feel that I have to live a little before settling down. I don't have anything to prove to myself or others before I have a family. I can have fun without being stupid and compromising my values. And, most of all, it's not because poor pitiful me can't find a man who will have mercy on me and take me in. It's simply because times have changed.
The Bible still applies today, don't get me wrong. We don't throw out the Bible because our world is different. But I don't recall reading anywhere in the Bible that "Thou shalt marry by the ageth of 16 or forever be subject to a life of displeasing God"...It's not in there...not even in the King James version. Yes, people in the Bible were married at a young age. But many people in the Bible were shepherds, too. Many people were watchmen. Many people would allow strangers who were passing through town to come and stay at their houses overnight. Have you met a lot of shepherds or watchmen in your lifetime? I haven't. And I wouldn't dream of allowing a stranger into my home to spend the night. We have hotels for that. The world has changed. And so we can't live our lives exactly as the people lived in the Bible.
I am 23 years old. I do not have a husband or children, but I do have a steadily growing relationship with God. A relationship in which I can go to Him with my concerns (a husband is one of those concerns, but not the only one). A relationship in which I can use the spiritual gifts He has given me to serve Him out of love and commitment. It is also a relationship in which He blesses me and knows what is best, sometimes keeping me from the things I ask Him for because I am not ready for them yet. We know each other intimately. We know what the other one desires and likes, and we do certain things and take certain attitudes in order to please one another...out of love. Sounds like God has taught me a lot about marriage already, huh?
And to further continue my rant, I DO NOT have an 'unwanted status', thank you very much. There are plenty of men out there I could 'settle' for. There are plenty of men out there who are not compatible with me because of personality differences and such. There are plenty of men out there who would take me in a second, but I know they would not provide me or my family with the spiritual leadership I have been waiting for. And, I'm sorry folks, but if I can't get that, then marriage isn't worth it to me. And don't tell me that my way of life is unbiblical. I think it's unbiblical to whimsically rush into marriage without consciously pouring over it, bathing it in prayer and wise direction from mentors and God Himself. I think it's unbiblical to get married just so you can say you're married. Last time I checked, there was a passage by the prophet Isaiah that said, "Those that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength."You see, God and i have this arrangement. I don't worry about a thing, and I just believe that He will tell me when it's time to get married and start a family. I'm not going to allow a desire for a husband to consume my life. God CAN and DOES use me now, in my singleness, and he CAN and WILL use me when I'm married. So, maybe I am single by choice, but it's not by my own choice...It's God's choice. And I think He probably knows what's best for me. Can you tell I'm more than a little incensed over this article? Sorry if I sound a little angry, but I am.
My worth is not determined by my marital status. Would I like to someday be married? Of course! Do I spend some evenings alone wondering why others my age got married, and I'm still single? You bet! Do I fear that I may always be alone, and that there is no man for me? Yes. But, the beautiful thing is, that when I find myself surrounded by all of these concerns (and even some whispers from the enemy), God is consistently reminding me that I should trust Him. I refuse to take control of this situation by going out and finding me a man. He has never failed me before, and He loves me more than I could ever fathom. He will provide what I need when I need it...bottom line.
Currently listening : A Liturgy, A Legacy & A Ragamuffin Band By Rich Mullins Release date: 26 October, 1993
Current mood: aggravated
OK, on another website I frequent, I have been involved in a discussion about this article. Here's the link: http://www.boundless.org/2005/articles/a0001199.cfm
read it, then come back and let me know what you think!
My grandmother has a really bad habit. Well, she probably wouldn't consider it a bad habit, but me (along with all of her other grandchildren) are severely annoyed. We all know she is going to do it. If you're over the age of 16, and you're in her presence, you can count on it. She greets you, gives you a hug, tells you one of two things (you look nice, or "don't you ever wear makeup?"), spends some time in casual conversation, compliments you a little. And just when you think you've escaped it, these words flow forth from her mouth like molten lava from a volcano, "So, Nicole (or whichever grandchild she happens to be talking to), you got a boyfriend...yet?"
Now, my cousins and I have been able to come up with some pretty creative responses to this question. One said, "No, Mama, I've decided I'm not going to get married." I told her once, "No. No boys like me. No boys will ever like me. I've just resigned myself to that fact." But the one classic response that left her speechless came from my sister (it was indeed a proud moment in the family), "No, Grandma, I'm a lesbian"...I'm trying to come up with a response to top that for next time. Bless my Grandma's heart. She is a very young grandmother. Young in years, and young at heart. She is a beautiful woman, a fashionable dresser, and a loving and godly person, but she just doesn't get it. Things were different in her day. She was married at the ripe old age of 15. She had more than one child at the age of 20. That life was all she knew. So she thinks me and my cousins are all old maids, and we better find us a man before it's slim pickin's.
She doesn't realize that the world is different now. Just like the author of this article doesn't realize that times have changed since the Bible. I don't go out and sit by the well to wait for a man to ask me to water his camels. I don't wear a veil to church. I don't go out and work in the family fields all day. I don't keep silent so as not to disturb the men.
Over time, God has allowed women a little more freedom. Some may call this a curse, I count it a blessing. Call it whatever you want, we are not the same. And with this added freedom comes added responsibility. We are now able to participate in worship services. We can go out and have a good time with our friends. We can have jobs and receive good education. We can be scholars of the Bible and drive cars and live our lives and date (that's right, I said 'the d word').
In the world we live in right now, we would never dream of sending a 14 year old girl into marriage. That's what they did in the Bible, though. But what Ms. Maken doesn't realize is that girls were sent into marriage at such a young age because they lifted a huge financial burden from their families. One less mouth to feed, one less kid to watch. And a 14 year old girl would have already learned all the ins and outs about keeping house, caring for children, tending the animals, providing for a husband. Times have changed. It is perfectly fine for a woman to wait until she is in her 20's to get married.
And it's not because of superficial men. I know many young men who are living godly lives and trusting God for their futures. I know a lot of men who would say their dream is to be a good father and husband, and they're just waiting on God's providence. And it's not because of "sewing our wild oats". I have no proverbial oats to be sewn. I don't feel that I have to live a little before settling down. I don't have anything to prove to myself or others before I have a family. I can have fun without being stupid and compromising my values. And, most of all, it's not because poor pitiful me can't find a man who will have mercy on me and take me in. It's simply because times have changed.
The Bible still applies today, don't get me wrong. We don't throw out the Bible because our world is different. But I don't recall reading anywhere in the Bible that "Thou shalt marry by the ageth of 16 or forever be subject to a life of displeasing God"...It's not in there...not even in the King James version. Yes, people in the Bible were married at a young age. But many people in the Bible were shepherds, too. Many people were watchmen. Many people would allow strangers who were passing through town to come and stay at their houses overnight. Have you met a lot of shepherds or watchmen in your lifetime? I haven't. And I wouldn't dream of allowing a stranger into my home to spend the night. We have hotels for that. The world has changed. And so we can't live our lives exactly as the people lived in the Bible.
I am 23 years old. I do not have a husband or children, but I do have a steadily growing relationship with God. A relationship in which I can go to Him with my concerns (a husband is one of those concerns, but not the only one). A relationship in which I can use the spiritual gifts He has given me to serve Him out of love and commitment. It is also a relationship in which He blesses me and knows what is best, sometimes keeping me from the things I ask Him for because I am not ready for them yet. We know each other intimately. We know what the other one desires and likes, and we do certain things and take certain attitudes in order to please one another...out of love. Sounds like God has taught me a lot about marriage already, huh?
Instead of recognizing that many single women are victims because of the deficits in the present construct, we dismiss their unwanted status as simply "God's will." Today's singleness is not celibacy-induced kingdom work unaccommodating to family life. No, it's the result of choices and mistakes by both the individual and society. Today's singleness is either a lifestyle option or purely circumstantial; therefore, it is largely unbiblical.
And to further continue my rant, I DO NOT have an 'unwanted status', thank you very much. There are plenty of men out there I could 'settle' for. There are plenty of men out there who are not compatible with me because of personality differences and such. There are plenty of men out there who would take me in a second, but I know they would not provide me or my family with the spiritual leadership I have been waiting for. And, I'm sorry folks, but if I can't get that, then marriage isn't worth it to me. And don't tell me that my way of life is unbiblical. I think it's unbiblical to whimsically rush into marriage without consciously pouring over it, bathing it in prayer and wise direction from mentors and God Himself. I think it's unbiblical to get married just so you can say you're married. Last time I checked, there was a passage by the prophet Isaiah that said, "Those that wait on the Lord shall renew their strength."You see, God and i have this arrangement. I don't worry about a thing, and I just believe that He will tell me when it's time to get married and start a family. I'm not going to allow a desire for a husband to consume my life. God CAN and DOES use me now, in my singleness, and he CAN and WILL use me when I'm married. So, maybe I am single by choice, but it's not by my own choice...It's God's choice. And I think He probably knows what's best for me. Can you tell I'm more than a little incensed over this article? Sorry if I sound a little angry, but I am.
My worth is not determined by my marital status. Would I like to someday be married? Of course! Do I spend some evenings alone wondering why others my age got married, and I'm still single? You bet! Do I fear that I may always be alone, and that there is no man for me? Yes. But, the beautiful thing is, that when I find myself surrounded by all of these concerns (and even some whispers from the enemy), God is consistently reminding me that I should trust Him. I refuse to take control of this situation by going out and finding me a man. He has never failed me before, and He loves me more than I could ever fathom. He will provide what I need when I need it...bottom line.
Currently listening : A Liturgy, A Legacy & A Ragamuffin Band By Rich Mullins Release date: 26 October, 1993
Thursday, December 8, 2005
Archives: Snow - Could it be that I'm Changing my Mind?
December 8, 2005 - Thursday
We got some snow today.....alright, it was pretty much a blizzard! Complete with 6 inches of fluffy white to cover the ground.
When it snowed like this last year, I remember thinking about the slick roads, the bad driving conditions, how I was trapped in the house with nothing to do, the cold wind hitting my face, scraping off my car every day (before AND after work), and all the other negative things a snowstorm entails.
But today, I must admit that I was struck by the solitude as I walked outside to brush off my car. It had been coming down for a few hours, and the roads were pretty much covered. I went out the door with my normal pessimistic mindset of scraping off the car with my hands freezing and my face turning bright red, and I still haven't figured out how to open my door without getting snow all over the driver's seat. But on my way out to the car, I noticed how quiet and still everything was outside. There were no loud cars speeding down the road, no noisy traffic, no big semis...The world was at peace and covered with a white glistening blanket that looked absolutely amazing.
Then I got to thinking....maybe a heavy snowfall is God's way of getting us to slow down a little. I don't know about other places in the country, but here in the Midwest, we are pretty accustomed to carrying off our daily tasks in any given weather (here you can use the ac and the heater in your car on the same day). Snow doesn't really stop us all that much. But even if we still go about our daily routines, we have to admit that we are nonetheless slowed down by it a little.
I know my life is always full of things to do. I have my schedule ready before I even get out of bed in the morning. Tonight, for instance, if it hadn't snowed, I am certain I would have called up the girls to see if they wanted to go to the mall or go out to dinner or something...it's just who I am. I like to be busy. That's why right now, I am watching TV, on the computer, and working on a scrapbook all at the same time. I think I have imposed a case of ADD on myself. Seriously, I cannot focus enough to get anything done in one sitting. But, with the snowfall tonight, instead of going out for a night on the town, I sat at home with my parents...we ate dinner together, watched some TV, my dad made me hot chocolate....and I would have missed out on that if it hadn't snowed.
Maybe I'll change my mind about the snow. Instead of seeing all the problems it causes me, which, if you think about them, aren't that bad, maybe I will think about slowing my life down, staying in and spending time with my family. I don't do that nearly enough.
We got some snow today.....alright, it was pretty much a blizzard! Complete with 6 inches of fluffy white to cover the ground.
When it snowed like this last year, I remember thinking about the slick roads, the bad driving conditions, how I was trapped in the house with nothing to do, the cold wind hitting my face, scraping off my car every day (before AND after work), and all the other negative things a snowstorm entails.
But today, I must admit that I was struck by the solitude as I walked outside to brush off my car. It had been coming down for a few hours, and the roads were pretty much covered. I went out the door with my normal pessimistic mindset of scraping off the car with my hands freezing and my face turning bright red, and I still haven't figured out how to open my door without getting snow all over the driver's seat. But on my way out to the car, I noticed how quiet and still everything was outside. There were no loud cars speeding down the road, no noisy traffic, no big semis...The world was at peace and covered with a white glistening blanket that looked absolutely amazing.
Then I got to thinking....maybe a heavy snowfall is God's way of getting us to slow down a little. I don't know about other places in the country, but here in the Midwest, we are pretty accustomed to carrying off our daily tasks in any given weather (here you can use the ac and the heater in your car on the same day). Snow doesn't really stop us all that much. But even if we still go about our daily routines, we have to admit that we are nonetheless slowed down by it a little.
I know my life is always full of things to do. I have my schedule ready before I even get out of bed in the morning. Tonight, for instance, if it hadn't snowed, I am certain I would have called up the girls to see if they wanted to go to the mall or go out to dinner or something...it's just who I am. I like to be busy. That's why right now, I am watching TV, on the computer, and working on a scrapbook all at the same time. I think I have imposed a case of ADD on myself. Seriously, I cannot focus enough to get anything done in one sitting. But, with the snowfall tonight, instead of going out for a night on the town, I sat at home with my parents...we ate dinner together, watched some TV, my dad made me hot chocolate....and I would have missed out on that if it hadn't snowed.
Maybe I'll change my mind about the snow. Instead of seeing all the problems it causes me, which, if you think about them, aren't that bad, maybe I will think about slowing my life down, staying in and spending time with my family. I don't do that nearly enough.
Monday, December 5, 2005
Archives: Searching for Mr. Darcy
December 5, 2005 - Monday
I have recently watched the new Pride & Prejudice (ok, I'll admit it, I've seen it twice and offered to go with someone for a third time...man I am a pathetic loser).It's not good for me to watch romantic movies like that. They should be required to put a disclaimer at the beginning of every sappy romance film.
Well, it's unfair for me to place that kind of responsibility on any man, no matter how perfect he is. I can't search for fulfillment in a man...men are human, they are just as messed up and vulnerable as I am. No man will ever be able to fulfill any void I have in my life.
If Mr. Darcy did really exist, what kind of relationship would that be? It would be one in which all my needs were met, I was always happy, never in want of anything. And he would not ever need anything from me. He would always find me beautiful, glamorous, and be there to provide for whatever I asked of him. Well, girls, as nice as that might sound, that is not a relationship! That is a genie, allowing you to induldge yourself without ever having any color in your life.
A relationship like this would not breed any growth, any depth, or any true commitment. It's easy to stay with someone who gives you everything you ask for and asks for nothing in return.
I am confident that God will bring my Mr. Darcy to me someday. My Mr. Darcy, however, will be slightly different from the one in the movie. My Mr. Darcy will get sick of my jokes sometimes. He will say things that hurt my feelings. He will not always see things from my vantage point and he will not give me everything I ask him for. My Mr. Darcy might be a little geeky. He will probably have trouble expressing how he truly feels. And he will fail me at times.
In the same vain, I will be his Elizabeth Bennett, but I won't always have the perfect thing to say. I won't always light up a room when I walk in. Sometimes I will yell at him, and pick and nag at the little things he does. Sometimes I will hurt his feelings. I may gain a lot of weight, or spend too much money, or not like his mother. I am certain there will be times when I am not beautiful to him (emotionally and physically).
That's the beauty of a relationship, though...Loving someone even when you don't feel like it. Pressing on when you're mad at him for leaving his socks on the bathroom floor, or farting in bed, or never helping out around the house. Sticking with it, even when you think he doesn't deserve it. And, really, that's more romantic than any old Mr. Darcy with an English accent (no matter how handsome he may be).
Love is modeled for us by our Creator. Who, in His great grace, loved us and sacrificed for us even when we didn't deserve it. We were unfaithful, disloyal, brats who gave no regard to Him...and He still loved us anyway. He loved us enough to sacrifice His Son on a cross so that we could be with him forever. Now that is romantic! And when my husband arrives in my life, I am going to choose to love Him with that same kind of love demonstrated by my Father. Afterall, the only reason we can love at all is because He loved us first.
So, ladies, go ahead an watch your romantic movies...we all love them, right? But when you watch, take in everything with a grain of salt...realizing that the world's perception of love is tainted and distorted from what we know real love is.
I have recently watched the new Pride & Prejudice (ok, I'll admit it, I've seen it twice and offered to go with someone for a third time...man I am a pathetic loser).It's not good for me to watch romantic movies like that. They should be required to put a disclaimer at the beginning of every sappy romance film.
WARNING The film you are about to see could give you a misinterpretation ofWhy is it when I watch a movie like Pride & Prejudice, I fantasize about my Mr. Darcy, coming to charm me and dash me away on a whirlwind ride to lifelong happiness? Why do I place all my hopes and longing for fulfillment in men? I start to think, I'll be truly happy when I get married...THAT is when my life will really start.
love, a longing for providence no human being can offer, and an inaccurate
perception of how relationships work.
Well, it's unfair for me to place that kind of responsibility on any man, no matter how perfect he is. I can't search for fulfillment in a man...men are human, they are just as messed up and vulnerable as I am. No man will ever be able to fulfill any void I have in my life.
If Mr. Darcy did really exist, what kind of relationship would that be? It would be one in which all my needs were met, I was always happy, never in want of anything. And he would not ever need anything from me. He would always find me beautiful, glamorous, and be there to provide for whatever I asked of him. Well, girls, as nice as that might sound, that is not a relationship! That is a genie, allowing you to induldge yourself without ever having any color in your life.
A relationship like this would not breed any growth, any depth, or any true commitment. It's easy to stay with someone who gives you everything you ask for and asks for nothing in return.
I am confident that God will bring my Mr. Darcy to me someday. My Mr. Darcy, however, will be slightly different from the one in the movie. My Mr. Darcy will get sick of my jokes sometimes. He will say things that hurt my feelings. He will not always see things from my vantage point and he will not give me everything I ask him for. My Mr. Darcy might be a little geeky. He will probably have trouble expressing how he truly feels. And he will fail me at times.
In the same vain, I will be his Elizabeth Bennett, but I won't always have the perfect thing to say. I won't always light up a room when I walk in. Sometimes I will yell at him, and pick and nag at the little things he does. Sometimes I will hurt his feelings. I may gain a lot of weight, or spend too much money, or not like his mother. I am certain there will be times when I am not beautiful to him (emotionally and physically).
That's the beauty of a relationship, though...Loving someone even when you don't feel like it. Pressing on when you're mad at him for leaving his socks on the bathroom floor, or farting in bed, or never helping out around the house. Sticking with it, even when you think he doesn't deserve it. And, really, that's more romantic than any old Mr. Darcy with an English accent (no matter how handsome he may be).
Love is modeled for us by our Creator. Who, in His great grace, loved us and sacrificed for us even when we didn't deserve it. We were unfaithful, disloyal, brats who gave no regard to Him...and He still loved us anyway. He loved us enough to sacrifice His Son on a cross so that we could be with him forever. Now that is romantic! And when my husband arrives in my life, I am going to choose to love Him with that same kind of love demonstrated by my Father. Afterall, the only reason we can love at all is because He loved us first.
So, ladies, go ahead an watch your romantic movies...we all love them, right? But when you watch, take in everything with a grain of salt...realizing that the world's perception of love is tainted and distorted from what we know real love is.
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