Pride & Prejudice...and Passion

January 8, 2007 - Monday
Current mood: impressed

She walks out into a foggy meadow at daybreak after a sleepless, troublesome night. As she is left alone with her thoughts, she gazes into the distance to see a mysterious, shadowy figure slowly and confidently approaching. The music swells as he comes into view. He walks straight for her, carrying the sunrise on his shoulders, his soft brown hair bouncing with each step.She peers into the fog wondering if this is a dream.
He is wearing the type of shirt one might expect from Fabio or some other man on the cover of a romance novel. It is made from white cotton with a V-neck, showing just enough chest hair to keep you interested. As he finally reaches her, the sun begins to bounce off of her wavy brown locks and he says, "You must know. Surely, you must know it was all for you. You are too generous to trifle with me. I believe you spoke with my aunt last night and it has taught me to hope...as I had scarcely allowed myself before.
If your feelings are still what they were last April, tell me so at once. My affections and wishes have not changed, but one word from you will silence me forever. If, however, your feelings have changed, I would have to tell you, you have bewitched me, body and soul. And I love, I love...I love you. I never wish to be parted from you from this day on."
She tenderly steps toward him and grasps his hand in both of hers."Well then," she softly kisses his hand. It is the kind of kiss in which the lips barely graze the skin, yet the deepest, truest love is conveyed through the brief contact they make with his knuckles."Your hands are cold," she says.
The music swells even more and the sound of birds chirping in the morning sky fills the air. As they continue to stare into one another's eyes, the blazing orange sun can now be seen between their two faces. Rather than sharing in a long, passionate kiss, they simply place their foreheads together, close their eyes and enjoy this moment, for it is all they need to know they will be together forever.

On any ordinary day, cheesey, obnoxiously romantic dialog and a horrendously cliche setting such as this would cause my body to go into involuntary and violent convulsions followed by a severe and painful round of dry heaves.

But last night Pride & Prejudice revealed something to me that I had never seen before...or maybe I had seen it, but chosen to ignore it. Either way, I feel as though I have been awakened to a new thought.

Darcy and Elizabeth Bennett did not have a storybook romance. They struggled. They hated one another. They were terribly embarrassed around each other. They misunderstood. They were stubborn.

Prior to this scene, every encounter between the two of them had been filled with an awkward interaction. They stumbled over their words. They yelled at one another. They were disgusted with each other, yet they were alike in every way.

If I hadn't known the story before watching this film, I never would have thought the two of them would end up together. They (okay, bear with me because this is going to sound overly simplified and probably rather corny) were too prideful and too prejudiced to be able to see the potential for what would come.

Even in their rocky beginning one thing can be said about the tumultuous relationship between these two: they were passionate.

Every encounter between Mr. Darcy and Elizabeth throughout the story is filled with passion, whether it is passionate fury, passionate disgust, passionate humor, passionate embarrasment, and eventually, passionate affection...passion was not something either of them was lacking for in terms of personality. Even their awkward encounters were filled with a strange sort of fervor and longing.

Watching this movie, yet again, has opened my eyes. Love is meant to be passionate.

Passionately patient, passionately kind, passionately humble, passionately selfless, passionately pleasant, passionately forgiving, passionately truthful, passionately protecting, passionately trusting, passionately hopeful, and passionately persevering.Love is not something to be taken lightly.

Love is an expression, an emotion, an action God provided us to express, emote, and act out with fervor. There is no room in love for half-heartedness. The proverbial "old college try" simply won't do. Love is something that requires all of our energy, all of our attention, all of our dilligence. Why do we throw the word "love" around so carlessly? I love hot dogs? I love Starbucks? I am the guiltiest one of all. I have oft been caught telling friends that I am madly in love with whomever happens to be my flavor of the week on television or in music or...whatever.

No wonder we go about love with lax and whimsical attitudes...we have over-used it, over-hyped it, over glamourized it, even over-romanticized it.

True, honest, passionate love requires the lover to be completely willing to dive into the grit and grime of human relationships. It begs for compassion and mercy when betrayal wins the battle over virtue. Passionate love demands a passionate forgiveness when we can't see ourselves as our lover does, and we lack the confidence to fully engage ourselves in that love relationship. Passionate love asks us to passionately confront our lover with the problems that need to be addressed, for passionate love knows that the passive-aggressive way of dealing with things leads to nothing but bitterness and resentment.

Passionate love makes us commit to strongly and deeply loving that person, even when we don't feel like it. It causes us to want to work through the dirt and the filth and the pain we bring each other and resurface stronger and more in love than ever before.

Does this longing for passion in any way negate my previous anti-romance rants-disguised-as-blogs? Not at all. I still don't want to fall whimsically, hopelessly, desperately and helplessly in love. I still don't want a man to come in and fix all of my problems and make me a whole person. I still don't think it's unbiblilcal for me to be a single woman who is waiting for God to bring someone to me. But when love does happen, I want it to be a passionate, real, authentic, gritty love.

I've never been married before. I don't have a boyfriend. I don't even have a date...so I could be all wrong about this whole love thing. Please, correct me and instruct me in the ways of love if you want to...I've got a lot to learn.And, okay, if I'm going to be terribly honest, that final scene in Pride & Prejudice, as much as I love that film, does leave me feeling a bit nauseated...just a little.

Archives: Flying Tips for Superman

Friday, June 30, 2006
Archives: Flying Tips for Superman
June 30, 2006 - Friday
Current mood: curious

I just saw the new Superman movie tonight...I wasn't going to go, but my wonderful and gorgeous friends Ali and Kim talked me into it. I thought I would hate it, but I actually quite enjoyed myself. I'm taking my brother to see it sometime soon again.

But, I do have a few questions for the man himself.

1. Don't you think you'd get better trajectory if you flew with your hands open, palms facing down, rather than the closed fist thing you do? I just think it would be more convenient for steering purposes...You don't see birds flying with their wings folded up...they spread them out. But, then again, I suppose that wouldn't help with the rumors that you are gay...you aren't are you?

2. Which leads to my second question....When are you planning to come rescue me? (That man is a talk drink of water...amazing, only he wears a little too much makeup)

3. Does it bother you that Lois Lane's eyes are two different colors? (If you go see the movie, check it out...her left eye is blue and her right eye is brown...this is particularly noticeable in the hospital scene)

4. What's with the jerry curl? (My friends and I were discussing this...it must be the jerry curl that renders him unrecognizeable to the general public and anyone else who knows Clark Kent...Kim posed an interesting thought on this matter: he must take the time after ripping his clothes off in an elevator to slick back his hair and then delicately form the curl and place it just so on his forehead)

5. Have you ever considered moving to a rural farm community in, say, Iowa or something? It appears to me you would have fewer demands if you were to live in a less populated area.

I have also decided that, as amazing and masculine and sexy and heroic as Superman is, I would never want to be in a relationship with him...That guy is just too busy. I would never get to spend any time with him, unless I got myself hurt or kidnapped or something...and that's really a lot of trouble to go to just to see someone. But if Clark is ever around, he can give me a call.

The movie is excellent for anyone who wants to go see it...It may be a little scary for children under 10. But there's not any language, nudity or sex in it. There is some violence, though...just a fair warning, and it is also nearly three hours long, so be sure to sit near the aisle so you can get out for a potty break if you need to...My mistake tonight, I had to climb over a couple of elderly people about 20 minutes into the movie.

Archives: Don't See The Lakehouse Unless You're Planning on Being Confused for the Rest of Your Life

June 27, 2006 - Tuesday
Current mood: distressed

I went tonight to see The Lakehouse...the new film starring Sandra Bullock and Keanu Reeves...Sandra, I'm okay with, but I have never enjoyed a single film, talk show, interview, commercial, preview, photo, or anything else featuring Keanu.

But I decided to go for it. You never know, perhaps he picked up some thespian skills since the last time I saw him.

As I was sitting in the theater, partaking of this blockbuster film, certain thoughts kept running loose through my mind. Thoughts I could not control, thoughts that are still with me now, thoughts such as...

If you're writing letters to someone in the past and they are in the future, does that mean there is some other dimension of life going on around us? Is there a 'me' two years from now, living my life...and is there a 'me' two years ago living my same life? And how could the two dimensions ever intersect with each other? And if someone should happen to intersect, and try to make a change, such as to prevent an accident from happening, which dimension does it change? The future would have already been happening and the present is going on right now, so the only dimension that would be changed would be the past, right? And what's the benefit of that? And if the past changes, then how does that affect the future (or the present for those of us living in the future dimension of the past)? And why does Keanu Reeves always sound like he's still in Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure no matter what type of role he is playing? And did that part of the movie occur in 2002, 2004, 2006? And did they get together in 2006 or 2008? And why didn't I think to bring a piece of gum with me after eating Fiesta Lime Chicken for dinner? And if people are messing around in the past dimension, do we realize it now in the future dimension? How does that affect our memories? Or perhaps we are not changing the future at all, but merely putting things into place so they can occur how they would have anyway...

This is why I can no longer watch films involving time travel and the like. I'm still obsessing over it. I can't figure it out. Maybe I'm just a little dim...or maybe I just need to remind myself that it's all just an imaginary story afterall.

If anyone else has seen this movie and understood it, or any other movie involving these past and present storylines, please enlighten me.

Archives: Searching for Mr. Darcy

December 5, 2005 - Monday

I have recently watched the new Pride & Prejudice (ok, I'll admit it, I've seen it twice and offered to go with someone for a third time...man I am a pathetic loser).It's not good for me to watch romantic movies like that. They should be required to put a disclaimer at the beginning of every sappy romance film.

WARNING The film you are about to see could give you a misinterpretation of
love, a longing for providence no human being can offer, and an inaccurate
perception of how relationships work.

Why is it when I watch a movie like Pride & Prejudice, I fantasize about my Mr. Darcy, coming to charm me and dash me away on a whirlwind ride to lifelong happiness? Why do I place all my hopes and longing for fulfillment in men? I start to think, I'll be truly happy when I get married...THAT is when my life will really start.

Well, it's unfair for me to place that kind of responsibility on any man, no matter how perfect he is. I can't search for fulfillment in a man...men are human, they are just as messed up and vulnerable as I am. No man will ever be able to fulfill any void I have in my life.

If Mr. Darcy did really exist, what kind of relationship would that be? It would be one in which all my needs were met, I was always happy, never in want of anything. And he would not ever need anything from me. He would always find me beautiful, glamorous, and be there to provide for whatever I asked of him. Well, girls, as nice as that might sound, that is not a relationship! That is a genie, allowing you to induldge yourself without ever having any color in your life.

A relationship like this would not breed any growth, any depth, or any true commitment. It's easy to stay with someone who gives you everything you ask for and asks for nothing in return.

I am confident that God will bring my Mr. Darcy to me someday. My Mr. Darcy, however, will be slightly different from the one in the movie. My Mr. Darcy will get sick of my jokes sometimes. He will say things that hurt my feelings. He will not always see things from my vantage point and he will not give me everything I ask him for. My Mr. Darcy might be a little geeky. He will probably have trouble expressing how he truly feels. And he will fail me at times.

In the same vain, I will be his Elizabeth Bennett, but I won't always have the perfect thing to say. I won't always light up a room when I walk in. Sometimes I will yell at him, and pick and nag at the little things he does. Sometimes I will hurt his feelings. I may gain a lot of weight, or spend too much money, or not like his mother. I am certain there will be times when I am not beautiful to him (emotionally and physically).

That's the beauty of a relationship, though...Loving someone even when you don't feel like it. Pressing on when you're mad at him for leaving his socks on the bathroom floor, or farting in bed, or never helping out around the house. Sticking with it, even when you think he doesn't deserve it. And, really, that's more romantic than any old Mr. Darcy with an English accent (no matter how handsome he may be).

Love is modeled for us by our Creator. Who, in His great grace, loved us and sacrificed for us even when we didn't deserve it. We were unfaithful, disloyal, brats who gave no regard to Him...and He still loved us anyway. He loved us enough to sacrifice His Son on a cross so that we could be with him forever. Now that is romantic! And when my husband arrives in my life, I am going to choose to love Him with that same kind of love demonstrated by my Father. Afterall, the only reason we can love at all is because He loved us first.

So, ladies, go ahead an watch your romantic movies...we all love them, right? But when you watch, take in everything with a grain of salt...realizing that the world's perception of love is tainted and distorted from what we know real love is.